From College BFFs to App Co-Founders
by Leigh Higginbotham Butler
SHARE ARTICLE
LEFT TO READ

minutes

PUBLISHED ON

May 24, 2022

ARTICLE LENGTH

13 Minute Read

SHARE ARTICLE
CONTRIBUTOR

From College BFFs to App Co-Founders

Leigh Higginbotham Butler and Stephanie Roberts in 2005

Twenty-three years ago, Stephanie Roberts and I never could have imagined that a friendship we developed on the campus of Hampton University would have been the catalyst toward building a virtual community in the groundbreaking app for Black mothers, Meet Akina.

Stephanie and I met the summer of my Junior year while I was serving as a Residential Assistant in the same dorm that Stephanie, an incoming Freshman, was assigned to for the summer pre-college program. We formed an immediate bond and quickly became more like sisters than friends. We soon formed our “chosen family” of other young ladies who to this day are still an integral part of our village.  Together, we would celebrate, nurture, protect and motivate one another throughout our matriculation and continue that same level of consistent devotion more than two decades later. 

Upon our respective graduations, Stephanie and I were in exciting positions both in public relations and government affairs in Washington, D.C, working in leadership roles and enjoying life on a somewhat disposable income. During our few years in DC we formed an extension of our village with my sister, cousin and a few new friends. I, the daughter of a doctor and lawyer from Fort Worth, TX and Stephanie, the daughter of a government executive and banking executive from Annapolis, MD both were raised to excel professionally, socially and personally. 

BlackLove.com Related Articles:
The 5 Truths That Opened Me Up to the Decision of Becoming a Mother
Safe Spaces: Communities for Black Mamas to Follow
These Mamas Mean Business

Leigh with her family

Within a few years, both ladies would meet, move and marry the men of their dreams and go on to each have three children. But it was not all a fairytale. Not that long ago, if you looked at me, you would never know I was struggling financially. I didn’t tell anyone because frankly, I was afraid; maybe a bit embarrassed. I didn’t want to be judged and didn’t want to be pitied. I certainly didn’t want anyone’s sympathy or handouts. So, my husband and I went through it in silence.  And living in silence can be a painful experience. A few years into our marriage, my husband and I were on the top of the world. Or, at least, we were living the upwardly-mobile-black-family dream. We were living in Birmingham, AL with our two baby boys.  My husband was VP of Business Banking for a well-known bank and was starting a small business. I was the District Director for a US Congressman. We were bringing in six-figures and had excellent insurance. I had a village around me of family, contacts and resources.  The sky was the limit for what we could achieve. 

However, 10 years later we closed our business and relocated to Dallas, TX, where I am from. I had just been laid off from my job and my husband was under-employed, working small jobs for hourly wages.  And, at 40, I was pregnant. When our third son was born, we had just moved to Frisco, a suburb of Dallas, so our kids could be in a good school district. But money was tight and getting tighter. We sustained a small amount of savings, the small paycheck my husband brought in, and help from some family. But then the money ran out. We were officially in crisis mode.Less than a year after marriage, Stephanie and her husband welcomed their first child. She found herself in a new city with no close friends, no family and in unfamiliar social territory. She struggled to adjust to a new life where she found herself fully dependent on and supported by her husband. It was a major adjustment from the independent city girl life of living, working and thriving in Washington, DC where she worked in Public Relations and the non-profit sector after graduating college.

Stephanie with her family

“I was not necessarily depressed, but I felt lonely and yearned for the deep in person friendships I had in college and in D.C. My husband had to travel for his family business more than we originally anticipated. All of my best friends lived in other states and were in different places in their lives. Everything moved so quickly and before I knew it, I was an exhausted new mom that was breastfeeding, changing diapers, cooking dinners and wondering if I would ever be fulfilled professionally ever again,” said Stephanie. A few years passed, and soon Stephanie would have her second child and within a few months, her husband requested her assistance within the family business. She found herself mothering 2 young kids all day and working well into the night. Weekends and holidays would also be spoken for with the on call demand of her position. It was overwhelming to say the least, but in a way, it was fulfilling. Within 2 years, Stephanie found herself pregnant again with their third child but she longed for a home and life balance and a career that she could be passionate about.  Fast forward to the top of the Covid Pandemic that would rock the entire world. My husband and I were just getting back on our feet and were both working full-time, I from home and my husband for a well-known financial institution. 

Stephanie and I found ourselves hunkered down with the rest of the world trying to stay safe, keep our families safe and maintain sanity. We watched in horror the murders of George Floyd, Ahmaud Aubery, and Breonna Taylor. We watched the world shift and finally turn its focus on a problem that we had known existed for as long as Black people had been in this country. During this time I would finally give up running from an idea that kept showing up in various ways and decided it was time to do something. From there I sat down and mapped out the idea of creating a virtual safe space for Black mothers and mothers of Black children. My husband and I ran the idea through some close friends and family and began to bring the idea to fruition. With a lot of hard work, determination and personal/family funds, Meet Akina became a reality. 

Courtesy of Meet Akina

I soon invited Stephanie to become an advisor as she was one of a few close friends who was able to invest time, energy and resources into assisting with generating ideas, securing investors and strategic partnerships that would soon cultivate the brand that is Meet Akina. Through those ideas and partnerships, I felt it only fitting that Stephanie should join as a Co-Founder and COO as a testimony to our collective efforts and passion for creating a safe space for black mothers and mothers of black children to communicate, share resources, learn, heal and grow together. It took all of the ups and down, wins and losses, to get to this place. It is the reason I am so passionate about motherhood and, specifically, what it means to be a black mom. A lot of us suffer in silence because we don’t know who to trust, who we can turn to, or what resources are out there. Or, we fear being judged or looked down upon. Often, we are the pillars of strength for our families, our communities, and we just don’t know how to reach out when we need help, too.  

Black Moms need a place to be our authentic true selves. We need to be able to lean on each other in good times and bad, to lift each other up during hard times, to not feel the instinct to hide at the times when we need support the most. To know that we aren’t alone, to have others speak some positivity and encouragement into our spirits or to hear from a mom who has been there goes a long way. Motherhood is already tough. But add to that the lack of resources and the challenges black moms face everyday raising black children in this unforgiving, unfair, and inequitable world where their lives, our lives, are not valued is even harder. Sure, we are often looked at as “strong” and “tough”, but I submit that many of us put on that exterior and suffer in silence, just like I was. We have been conditioned to live in this silence, to carry burdens on our own. It is time to shed that conditioning.  

The truth is, yes, it takes a village to raise a child. But it also takes a village to lift up a Mom––and, every Mom deserves that village. Meet Akina is that village realized. Meet Akina is an interactive social platform built for and by our community to connect moms of color across the world and to inspire and support one another as we navigate our motherhood journey. Moms can have real conversations about motherhood –– the challenges, rewards, and all things in between. We intentionally set up our company as a Public Benefit Corporation, a B-Corp, and have committed to giving back to nonprofits and organizations that are doing the boot-on-the-ground work to impact the lives of Black women and children. 

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Meet Akina (@meetakina)

Our mission is to create an interactive social platform that encompasses safe spaces for moms of color to have candid conversations about the things that shape, move, and inspire our respective communities and to share resources that will support them as they raise strong, resilient children. Today, I invite you to shed away our silence, and our invisibility, and pledge to use our collective voices, stories, and experiences to acknowledge, support, and celebrate one another.  This is how we build the village of our dreams. Take your place. Use your voice. Let’s find our way. Together.

Download the Meet Akina app today at MeetAkina.com.

JOIN THE CONVERSATION