Want to Increase Your Chances for Love in 2022? Hire a Matchmaker!
by Yasmine Jameelah
SHARE ARTICLE
LEFT TO READ

minutes

PUBLISHED ON

January 10, 2022

ARTICLE LENGTH

17 Minute Read

SHARE ARTICLE
CONTRIBUTOR

Want to Increase Your Chances for Love in 2022? Hire a Matchmaker!

Couple walking with dog
Courtesy of pexels.com

Singles, listen up! If you’re serious about finding a life partner, consider matchmaking. There are multiple ways to find love, and as a community that celebrates ways to increase the chances of partnership, we’re diving into matchmaking. Black Love spoke with Devyn Simone who shared her insight into the process of finding a matchmaker, being open to different ideas of your ideal partner, and more.

Black Love: How did you become you a matchmaker?

Devyn Simone: I’ve always been sort of fascinated with the dynamics of relationships. My parents divorced when I was two and then remarried people shortly after. And I just remember growing up kind of wondering what made these new relationships seemingly better, right. Because when they split, I was so young that I didn’t really remember them ever together. So I don’t remember any of the problems. And as a kid, you wonder why didn’t Mommy and Daddy work? So that just kind of pushed me to being fascinated and watching other people’s relationships. I bought self-help relationship books with my allowance; even in elementary school, I was some sort of counselor, if you will. 

We had these class dollars called PT points that you would get for good behavior or getting a good grade on a test. I set up two chairs in the gymnasium, and students would sit and tell me about who they had a crush on, I’d take notes and give them pointers on how to communicate that they had a crush on so and so. If it was a lost cause, I told them to just run a few laps around the gym. My teachers probably should have been alarmed at the time, but nobody was that just carried with me throughout my whole life.

And in high school I was certainly sitting in my guidance counselor’s office often, but not because I was in trouble more because we were talking about relationships, whether it be their own, the relationship with some of my teachers, or just dating in high school. And eventually, that turned into a blog. Then that blog turned into a television show. So it’s been sort of this crazy journey. I’m still just as fascinated by relationships and our understanding of them. It’s my mission to not only have a good or healthy one, whatever that looks like for me but also to help others.

Devyn Simone at the Black Love Summit 2021 (Courtesy of MayaJoan)

Black Love: What would you say to someone specifically who’s skeptical and feels like, okay, this is not something we do as a culture to find love?

Devyn Simone: I think a healthy dose of skepticism in anything is okay and can serve you. But I think there’s a difference between skepticism and unknowing criticism. And part of the challenges we faced as Black people is that we haven’t had a seat at the table in many aspects. But I also think that now, as things evolve, so should our openness to new things. We deserve all the other great things that anyone else has been getting. Sometimes because of our own tightly held beliefs, we can be slow to act or to do things that ultimately serve us right for the greater good in our community. And I think that’s also true in Matchmaking.

Sometimes because of our own tightly held beliefs, we can be slow to act or to do things that ultimately serve us right for the greater good in our community. And I think that’s also true in Matchmaking.

I’m thrilled that I’m seeing more and more people of color take advantage of it. I’ve seen how it has changed lives for so many, and I want anyone who is single and just looking to be loved in the way that they deserve to be loved to know that this is a real option and it really works. There are babies in existence because of matchmaking. There may have happy and thriving relationships in existence, and it’s important not to be so caught up on how you got there, but more about what you have, right? None of that matters when you are sitting there with your person and enjoying life with your person and thriving and feeling more powerful because you have good love in your life.

There are babies in existence because of matchmaking. There may have happy and thriving relationships in existence, and it’s important not to be so caught up on how you got there, but more about what you have, right? None of that matters when you are sitting there with your person and enjoying life with your person and thriving and feeling more powerful because you have good love in your life.

Courtesy of @devynsimone/Instagram

Black Love: Let’s jump into the cost of matchmaking. My only reference honestly to cost is an episode of Girlfriends. I remember William was trying to find someone, and he went to this celebrity matchmaker, and I think the cost was $20,000, and my first thought was “Wait, 20 grand to find love? ” What would you say the average price for a matchmaker would be for someone interested?

Devyn Simone: Yes. First, I want to address the point that you made about the response to William being like, oh, my God; it’s going to cost me 20 grand to find love? I hear phrases like that a lot, and I get it. It totally makes sense. But when you have that thought process, it too can be prohibited to the ultimate goal, right? So if you think of your dream career and then you think about how much you spend on college, right? To be a journalist, I have to go to school. It’s going to cost me 60 grand to get to this important place in my life? But the emphasis should be on the value it adds to your life, and not the upfront investment of what it takes to get there. I get that it’s an investment, but let’s just say that because I don’t know how much I spend on takeout, but I’m sure if I put it together in aggregate, I could afford at least the services where I work.

Our process is a little more unique, which is great. And we also tried to structure our price range to not be so out of reach for everyone. Our prices ranged from around 6,000 and up, depending on the package you’re looking for and the length of time that we’re working together. I’d also encourage people to interview different matchmaking agencies or companies. I would ask how they are structured as a business because when I said they’re not all created equal, that’s true. And what I mean by that is at three-day rule, we don’t offer membership to everyone.

BlackLove.com Related Articles:
Are You Ready for Love? Here Are 5 Signs It’s Time to Hire a Dating Coach
Dating Apps for Single Black People
The Art of Dating With BLK (VIDEO)

The goal behind that is that when we agree to match you, it’s because we’re confident we can find what it is. And you’re like, I have a graduate degree. I prefer someone with a graduate degree, and I’m 5’9 as a woman; I prefer a guy who’s 5’10 above or whatever. Like, okay, we commit to that. It’s like we’re committing that we can do that specifically.

Whereas if you never went to school, which is no judgment, but you’re like, I only want to be with a guy who has six degrees, that may be a harder ask. Because we want our clients to have a good experience to be successful. So anyone looking at different matchmaking companies, I would just look into what their structure is, what the matching guarantees are, whether or not they do work with pretty much anyone, because you want the company that’s thoughtful and intentional, in my opinion than the one who will just kind of say yes to everyone and knowing that that’s not realistic understood with pricing.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Devyn Simone (@devynsimone)

Black Love: So, tell me more about your agency. Would someone looking to match be paying for the entire process, or just to find your partner?

Devyn Simone: Yes. So you’re paying for the whole experience. So for us, you have two experts on your team. You have your matchmaker. Who’s there to give you feedback and support you, you can think of her as your wing woman. In addition to that, you also have your own day coach as well. We have a fabulous team of state coaches who are here to guide you. While most of the people we work with don’t have a problem getting dates/finding relationships, we all have blind spots, even doctors have doctors. And sometimes it’s about meeting someone different outside of your circle and shifting your perspective by even just half a percentage point. I mean, if we think about where we are now and think about who you maybe would have dated ten years ago and what was important to you ten years ago, right? If you’ve grown in the last ten years, it’s likely that your perspective has changed a little bit and what was meaningful then and what’s meaningful now. 

Black Love: Are they any free matchmaking options?

Courtesy of @devynsimone/Instagram

Devyn Simone: Yes, there’s a free database in our matchmaking also. So for those who are still really hesitant about it, you can certainly dip your toe and be in the database for free. There’s no guarantee they’ll be matched, but they could be potentially. So it’s better than doing nothing. 

Black Love: What would you tell anyone looking to find love? 

Devyn Simone: The search for love is ever-evolving, and the way that we connect with people evolve. The most powerful thing I found is getting to a place where you not only love yourself. Like you genuinely just appreciate you and all that you’ve come through. I’ve also been through hell and back in previous relationships, but it doesn’t have to be that way. You deserve to be loved for all that you are now and everything you strive to be, and it exists. There is value in having someone in your corner, my aunt always told me joy shared is joy doubled and trouble shared is trouble half. So when you have a partnership, it’s like your big wins are twice as good, and your hard moments are half as bad.

Even if dating apps aren’t for you when you’re going to the grocery store or running errands, have your head up, have a smile on your face, even behind the mask it shows in your eye-line. But have your head up. Be aware of your surroundings because you never know who that person that might be going to grab the potato chips next to you is, or you may strike up a conversation. You really don’t know. It sounds sort of wild, but those things still happen.

While you’re putting yourself out there, remember while it may take lot of time and can be a little annoying, it’s worth it! Even if dating apps aren’t for you when you’re going to the grocery store or running errands, have your head up, have a smile on your face, even behind the mask it shows in your eye-line. But have your head up. Be aware of your surroundings because you never know who that person that might be going to grab the potato chips next to you is, or you may strike up a conversation. You really don’t know. It sounds sort of wild, but those things still happen. Like people still can meet that way if you get invited to an event and you really don’t want to go obviously be mindful in terms of health and what we have going on right now, but still go or if you have a date, don’t cancel it at the last minute because you never know. Even if that person is not your person, you don’t know who they might know who could be your person. So just keep creating opportunity.

And if you feel like you’re struggling, call me! We have a database of over 15,000 singles. 

JOIN THE CONVERSATION