Dr. Judith, who is the author of High Functioning: Overcome Your Hidden Depression and Reclaim Your Joy, keeps it real about her own experience with depression, the realities of high-functioning mental health struggles, and why Black women, in particular, face unique challenges when it comes to seeking help.
What Is High-Functioning Depression, Really?
High-functioning depression is one of those things that isn’t always easy to recognize—especially when you’re busy, productive, and still handling your responsibilities. But just because you’re getting things done doesn’t mean you’re okay. Dr. Judith breaks it down, explaining that high-functioning depression differs from traditional depression because, on the surface, everything looks fine. But underneath, many people struggle with anhedonia (a lack of joy), burnout, and exhaustion that they can’t seem to shake.
“They can’t slow down because they don’t want to let their community down,” she continues. “Black women, we do not want to disappoint anyone, because we sometimes feel like we’re lucky to be there.” The weight of always having to be strong, to prove yourself, to hold it down—it takes a toll. And too often, high-functioning depression is dismissed or ignored until it reaches a breaking point.
The Five V’s: A Framework for Finding Joy
Dr. Judith offers a practical, manageable approach to reclaiming joy—one step at a time. Her “Five V” framework gives us simple, everyday strategies to combat depression and start prioritizing mental well-being:
1. Validate
“Imagine that there are five things that, if you do a little bit of every day — you can pick one or two, not all five — then happiness is within reach,” Dr. Judith says. “We all have the capacity to create dopamine, which is the happy chemical. So if you feel as if you’re not getting joy, you can do one of these five things every day.”
The first V is validation—acknowledging and accepting how you feel, no matter what. Instead of brushing off your emotions or pretending you’re fine, try being honest. “Actually say, ‘I’m burnt out. I’m depressed. I’m overwhelmed,’” she advises. “Acknowledging how you feel decreases uncertainty, and humans need to know how they’re feeling.”
2. Vent
But let’s be clear—venting is not the same as trauma-dumping. Dr. Judith emphasizes the importance of expressing your feelings in a healthy way, whether that’s talking to a trusted friend, journaling, singing, dancing, or painting. “You can vent in a way that feels authentic to you,” she says. “And when you let those emotions out, you actually feel better.”
3. Values
We all love nice things, but real happiness doesn’t come from material possessions. “These are things that are priceless, not things with price tags,” Dr. Judith reminds us. “At the end of the day, when I’m on my deathbed, I’m not going to be like, ‘I wish I bought a Prada bag.’ I’m going to be like, ‘I wish I had more time with my daughter.’”
4. Vitality
Your body and brain? You only get one. Dr. Judith drives this home with a lesson she teaches her daughter daily: “How many bodies did God give you?” Her daughter answers, “One, Mommy!” And then comes the follow-up question: “What do you have to do with it?” The answer? Take care of it.
“What you eat, how much you move, how much you rest—all of it affects your mental health,” Dr. Judith says. “Eating processed food that increases inflammation can make you depressed. Being in toxic relationships can take a toll on your well-being. Sleep, movement, and nourishing your body matter more than you realize.”
5. Vision
Finally, don’t forget to celebrate yourself. “Many of us do great things, and then we’re just onto the next,” Dr. Judith says. “But celebrate your wins. Acknowledge them. Don’t just say, ‘Okay, what’s next?’ Take a moment to appreciate yourself, because tomorrow is not promised.”
Destigmatizing Depression & Taking the Next Step
Mental health, spirituality, and cultural perspectives all intersect in this conversation, and one thing is clear—Black people deserve the space to process their pain, heal, and thrive. Dr. Judith’s message is simple: You don’t have to wait until you break down to seek help. And finding joy isn’t about huge, dramatic changes; it’s about small, consistent steps every day.
Her book, High Functioning: Overcome Your Hidden Depression and Reclaim Your Joy, hits bookshelves on April 8, and is sure to be a game-changer for anyone looking to better understand their mental health and find real, sustainable joy. So, if you’re a high-achieving person who’s been struggling silently, take this as your sign to start prioritizing yourself. You deserve joy. And as Dr. Judith reminds us, it’s within reach.
Trigger Warning: This episode contains mention of suicide from 06:45 – 08:00, which may be triggering for some listeners. Tune in to the latest episode of The Mama’s Den now on all podcast platforms and watch on Black Love’s YouTube channel.
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