Owning my power and authentically sharing my gifts is how I practice self-love. It took me several years to find my way back to myself, back to my purpose. I remember a few years ago, I came across an old assignment from 1999. I was in junior high, and my civic literacy teacher, Miss Hartley, had us write out what our lives would be like at age 16, 20, and 27. I was writing a vision statement before I knew what a vision statement was.
When I came across that assignment a few years ago, I read through it and saw that in the last paragraph, I said the 20 year old me had dreams of becoming a children’s book writer. I don’t even remember writing that. What was interesting, though, was that I had drawn a squiggly line in red ink underneath “children’s book writer” and wrote “lawyer” above it. I recognized my penmanship and realized that I must’ve come back to the assignment when I was in high school and wrote “lawyer” above my initial declaration.
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I knew who I wanted to become when I said I was going to be a children’s book writer 20+ years ago. The 6-year-old me knew who she wanted to become when she wrote her first poem on a napkin. The 8-year-old me knew who she wanted to become when she wrote her first short story (shout out to my 3rd grade teacher, Miss Gadbury). The 9 year old me knew who she wanted to become by having one of her poems published.
And now, here I was, reading the 12 year old me declaring who she wanted to become and then as soon as she hit high school, she forgot who she was. I chased traditional pathways because I didn’t see, nor know, what was possible.
On December 31, 2012, I listened to a sermon that changed the trajectory of my life and career. Bishop Dale Bronner said, “Don’t die with your gifts still on the inside of you; impart to others what was entrusted to you.” That charge led me to publishing my first book, a collection of poems and short stories called, “My Channeled Energy”, which became an Amazon #1 Bestseller in two categories.
I later started my self-love and children’s media brand called, I Am Unique! This brand stemmed from my childhood insecurity of having a birthmark, which covers a quarter of my back and part of my shoulder. I wouldn’t wear certain tops or dresses that exposed it. For my high school prom, I had the makeup artist cover it up with foundation because I wanted to look beautiful that night. Fast forward to today, I realize that no one should feel so insecure that they cover up a piece of who they are. I turned a childhood insecurity into a mission to inspire kids (and adults) to overcome their own insecurities so they can share their unique gifts with the world.
Life has a way of untethering us from who we were created to be. Whether it’s pressures from society, our upbringing, or environment—we begin to stray away from who we truly are at our core. There’s some self work required to (re)discover ourselves. Unlearning is a process. What I’ve come to realize is that there is no blueprint. I had to sit in the discomfort of knowing that I am the blueprint I was searching for. That I had to find my way back to myself and become the woman the little girl in me needed to see.
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People will try to tell you who you are when they barely even know themselves. I look back at my 6,7,8 year old self getting up on stages in front of seas of people, reciting poems I had written effortlessly, proudly, and with no inhibition. I look back at that girl, and she is the reason why and how I show up today. She loaned me the courage to use my voice now in the same uninhibited way.
The harsh reality is that no one is coming to save us. That (s)hero we’re waiting for? They’ve been in the mirror, staring at us this whole time, waiting to be activated. Give yourself permission to become the person your inner child needs to see. They’ll be grateful for you taking that first step toward your life’s purpose, and welcome you home
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