Deya & Marvin
Courtesy of SixEleven Visuals
Courtesy of SixEleven Visuals
Marvin and I met in college at Morgan State University. We were actually in the same Social Warfare Policy class with Dr. Gadsden. He always sat in the back of the class, and I always sat in the front. During college, we were strictly friends and only chatted occasionally. At the time, he had a girlfriend, and I had a boyfriend. Two years after graduation, we randomly ran into each other at a friend’s gathering. We exchanged numbers, went on several dates, and six months later, he asked me to be his girlfriend.
We were hit with a big test in our relationship in the early stages of dating each other. Marvin received a job offer, and he had to begin on the job training out of state in Vermont. Our relationship eventually turned into a long-distance relationship for nearly five years! We were only dating for six months before he left to live in a different state while I stayed in Washington, D.C.
To make things work, we made arrangements to see each other almost every month or every other month. We also made it a priority to talk on the phone every day, even if it was just for five minutes. It was a very challenging and difficult period in our lives. Marvin was unsure when he would be able to transfer back because there were no immediate job openings in his field at the time. It could take anywhere from two to four years or more. But while he was away, I used that time to work on me, and he did the same. I developed a very close relationship with God, attended church regularly, and noticed a tremendous difference within myself as my faith began to grow. I prayed to God and asked if this was “His will” and if it was to give me signs.
Courtesy of Bruce Inspired
Fortunately, every sign I received was confirmation in my eyes. I wholeheartedly feel that our faith in each other and God are the main reasons that kept us together. After Marvin completed training, a job opening became available, and he was finally able to move back home! We adjusted to our new normal very well, and nearly two years later, he proposed on my birthday. We were married in the summer of 2019, and we’re now expanding our family, expecting our first child together due next month! God is so good!
We both knew this was it because if we can make it through five years of long-distance love, then we can get through just about anything. We proved to each other that we are not quitters in this. We were equally yoked and strived to build the same future together.
Our advice to other couples is simple: COMMUNICATION, COMPROMISE, FAITH, and PRAYER. With God, all things are possible, and when you honor him, He will honor you. What makes a relationship work is two people who are on the same page and both putting forth the same amount of effort. A relationship takes two people who refuse to give up on each other despite the circumstances. It takes giving grace when one falls short. I am so glad we both fought through this, especially during our time living apart. In a relationship, one cannot be selfish. It was never easy, but this journey has made our relationship solid and well worth every added detail that contributed to our love story.
Reflections by @glambydeya
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