Self-Care Tips for Mamas During the Pandemic
by Jasmine Raheem
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January 18, 2022

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Self-Care Tips for Mamas During the Pandemic

Mom with her daughter on laptop
Courtesy of rawpixel.com

We all know parenting is hard, and with that responsibility comes sacrifice. As a parent, especially as moms, we often have to put our needs on the back burner and prioritize the needs of our children. I have always felt like moms are never allowed to have weak moments. Anytime I have exhibited any sign of weakness or vented to my mom or any other older woman in my family, it was always met with a, “You can’t complain, this is what you signed up for!” or, “It’s not about you anymore, those days are over.” When honestly, us millennial parents are parenting our way through this pandemic like parenting has never been done before. And we are doing the damn thing!

No other generation of parents has had to juggle working from home during a pandemic, while simultaneously helping our children during remote learning. Guiding them through their stresses of missing their friends and not being able to socialize. Not being able to do all the fun activities we all were used to. Being away from family! Not knowing what in the world is going on in our country or what was yet to come. Let’s not talk about how difficult it has been to keep your house afloat while trying to remain sexy and keep the spark in your marriage. Us moms are tired! And we deserve to say that.

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Mom with her children cleaning
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March of 2020 was the beginning of my journey to prioritizing myself. I had a 3-month old baby, and instead of getting back into the workforce from maternity leave, I was gearing up to assist our other four children with remote learning. Schools were closed due to the pandemic, and life as we knew it had ended. We all had to adjust. So not only was I dealing with postpartum hormonal imbalances, I had to meet the needs of five children, all with different personalities, attitudes, and learning styles. My house was turned upside down. No matter how much I cleaned, the house stayed junky. No matter how much I cooked, the kids stayed hungry. No matter how much I “woosahed,” I stayed frustrated.

My husband, being the hard-working man that he is, didn’t realize it at first. I found myself resenting him and being jealous of his freedom. Although he woke up early every morning to go to work, he was still GOING! He was getting out of the house. He had adult interaction, whereas I was home all day, yelling at the kids and breastfeeding my infant in-between time. He would come home, take a nice nap, then wake up and go to the gym. My life literally revolved around the house and the kids, the kids and the house. I was envious and would often take it out on my husband. When really, I had to place the blame on myself. I had to realize that my mental health and happiness, are no one else’s responsibility but my own. I had to be intentional about prioritizing myself. 

Sometimes I would feel like because I was home all day, my husband would think that I had been relaxing. I often felt like he looked down on the role that I played. After long talks and tough conversations with my husband, he finally understood everything that I had been going through. He admitted that he could have never done all that I had done for our family. So I became extremely intentional about carving some time out for myself. My husband supported me every bit. Just like my husband had his daily routine of leaving out for the gym, I created my time. Here are some self-care tips for Mothers I did to reclaim my time as Mom.

  1. I lit more candles. 
  2. I prayed and meditated more.

    Woman meditating
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  3. I went on walks by myself. That was very therapeutic for me. 
  4. Even when I didn’t need anything, I made it my business to grab an iced coffee and run to Target. I would disappear for hours.
  5. I started working out.
  6. I started taking pole dancing classes. It was something new for me and I absolutely loved it! 
  7. I even did brunch with my girls here and there. I slowly but surely started feeling like myself again and I LOVED it. 
Courtesy of Photographer Christian Adkins
Courtesy of Photographer Christian Adkins

What I found so rewarding that I didn’t realize at first was that by prioritizing myself, I actually became a better mom. I wasn’t as frustrated and tired while interacting with my children. Taking my children out to fun places didn’t feel like such a task to me anymore, I actually enjoyed it. I grew more patient and compassionate. I became a happier wife. As a Mom, it’s always easy to get lost in your responsibilities. I still have my moments where I fall back into overload. Especially now that we just bought a home and I have a new job with a remote position. I have been busting my butt to make sure our home is perfect, all while getting the kids to and from school and completing my work. But what makes this time different is my level of awareness.

You cannot be intentional about prioritizing yourself unless you become aware of your self-neglect. Anything that is not contributing to your well-being will only end up contributing to self-sabotage. You must prioritize yourself. You will be thankful for it and so will your loved ones.

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