What Hollywood Can Teach Us About Self Love

Believe it or not – Hollywood has a way of capturing life’s most powerful lessons, including the journey of self love. Through iconic characters and unforgettable storylines, movies and TV shows often reflect the highs and lows of discovering and embracing our true selves. Whether it’s a triumphant comeback, a moment of deep self-reflection, or the courage to walk away from what no longer serves us, Hollywood reminds us that self love is a journey worth taking.

For Black Love’s 31 Days of Self Love, we’re celebrating the stories that inspire us to prioritize ourselves. From Issa Dee’s messy but beautiful growth in Insecure to Brandon’s resilience in Young. Wild. Free., these tales reflect the many ways we can honor, care for, and uplift ourselves. Let’s explore what these cinematic moments teach us about loving ourselves fully.

1. “Waiting to Exhale” – Finding Strength in Sisterhood

Terry McMillan’s Waiting to Exhale gave us four unforgettable women—Savannah, Bernadine, Robin, and Gloria—navigating love, heartbreak, and rediscovering themselves. Each character’s journey highlights a different facet of self love: setting boundaries, walking away from toxicity, embracing change, and celebrating who you are. When Bernadine (Angela Bassett) burns her ex-husband’s belongings, it’s more than catharsis—it’s a reclamation of her worth.

2. “Insecure” – Growth Is Messy and Beautiful

Issa Rae’s Insecure is practically a love letter to self-discovery. Over five seasons, we watched Issa Dee stumble, learn, and grow. Whether she was rapping in the mirror or navigating her complicated relationships, Issa reminded us that self-love is a journey, not a destination. Her decision to prioritize her dreams over her fears showed us the power of betting on ourselves.

3. “The Pursuit of Happyness” – Resilience as Self Love

Will Smith’s portrayal of Chris Gardner in The Pursuit of Happyness is a masterclass in resilience. Gardner’s determination to create a better life for himself and his son underscores an essential truth: self love often means refusing to give up, even in the face of overwhelming odds. His unwavering belief in his own potential inspires us to fight for our dreams, no matter how tough the road gets.

4. “How Stella Got Her Groove Back” – Rediscovering Joy

When Stella Payne (Angela Bassett again—because she’s the queen of reinvention!) takes a trip to Jamaica in How Stella Got Her Groove Back, she rediscovers the joy she’d buried under work and responsibilities. Stella’s story reminds us that self-love sometimes means stepping out of our comfort zones, embracing pleasure, and allowing ourselves to be loved.

 

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5. “Girlfriends” – Love Yourself, Flaws and All

Tracee Ellis Ross’s Joan Clayton in Girlfriends is relatable in her quest for love and fulfillment. But the show’s true brilliance lies in its depiction of imperfect women learning to love themselves and each other. Joan’s journey of realizing that she doesn’t need to be “perfect” to be happy is a powerful reminder that self-love includes embracing our flaws.

6. “Black Panther: Wakanda Forever” – Grieving Is Loving Yourself

In Black Panther: Wakanda Forever, Shuri’s (Letitia Wright) journey through grief teaches us that self-love includes giving ourselves grace during hard times. As she processes the loss of her brother T’Challa, Shuri learns to honor her feelings and lean on her community for support. The movie reminds us that it’s okay to feel deeply and to take the time we need to heal.

7. “Queen Sugar” – Owning Your Narrative

Ava DuVernay’s Queen Sugar is a masterclass in self-love through authenticity. The Bordelon siblings—Nova, Charley, and Ralph Angel—navigate generational trauma, societal expectations, and personal aspirations. Charley’s refusal to conform and Nova’s journey to self-acceptance demonstrate the importance of owning your truth.

8. “Harlem” – Living Boldly

Amazon Prime’s Harlem celebrates the audacious pursuit of dreams and self-expression. Camille, Quinn, Tye, and Angie remind us to live authentically, embrace our individuality, and celebrate our wins—big or small. Their boldness is a reminder that self-love includes giving ourselves permission to shine unapologetically.

9. “Young. Wild. Free.” – Choosing Yourself Against All Odds

BET+’s Young. Wild. Free. dives into the complexities of mental health, family pressures, and self-discovery. The story of Brandon, a young man navigating the struggles of adulthood while dealing with his inner demons, is a poignant reminder of the importance of self-care. As Brandon learns to confront his challenges head-on, he teaches us that self-love often means seeking help, setting boundaries, and prioritizing our well-being, even when life feels overwhelming.

Ultimately, Hollywood’s biggest lesson is that self-love is multifaceted. These stories show us that self-love is as diverse as we are. It’s in the quiet moments of reflection, the big decisions that honor our worth, and the connections that help us thrive. This January, as we celebrate Black Love’s 31 Days of Self Love, let’s take a page from these Hollywood narratives and commit to loving ourselves fiercely, just as we are. Because, as the great RuPaul says, “If you don’t love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?”